Q: I feel helpless in the face of the world’s suffering. I don’t know what to do about the pain I see all around me. It’s driving me crazy. Well, you know, it takes a lot of energy and attention to drive yourself crazy. If you redirect that energy away from “feeling helpless” and bring […]
Tag Archives | fear
5 Ways to Transform Fear & Self Doubt Into Peace & Happiness
We human beings have an amazing capacity to form positive mental habits. Every day we have innumerable opportunities to change the channel. We can shift from a fearful state of self doubt to an empowered state of peace and happiness. In my previous article, I talked about two ways we can do this by noticing […]
The Best Way to Start and End Your Day Free of Stress & Anxiety
Do you start and end your day immediately thinking about your “To Do” list or your “To Avoid” list or a mix of both? If so, you may have gotten used to a constant level of stress or anxiety and a speedy thinking mind, jumping form one line of thought to another: “I absolutely have […]
How To Stop Worrying In Relationships
Do you ever find yourself worrying what your partner or spouse might be thinking of you? Is it hard for you to be open and honest because you’re afraid they’ll think you’re stupid, dorky, or worse . . . boring? Maybe you’ve found yourself mentally revising and editing what you wanted to say, so much […]
Everything That Distresses You is Irrelevant! Desire vs. Attachment (Part 1)
Distress, worry . . . irrelevant!? Most people are interested and puzzled by this proposition – some angered! How can I not be worried or distressed about being unemployed, sick, or because of a significant loss? I find in working with clients that the main causes of confusion about the needlessness of distress relate to 4 […]
How to Throw Away Hurt Feelings So They Don’t Come Back
If we feel upset when things go wrong or something unpleasant and unexpected happens, we’re not exactly unique in this world. But if we develop the habit of holding on to these upset feelings, we may resort to drinking too much, using drugs, or overeating (using food like a drug) in a futile effort to try and feel better. We don’t even […]
How Not to Double Down on Your Anxiety
Do you ever get an anxious feeling . . . followed by a fearful thought that something must be going wrong? Then the thought that something is wrong makes you feel more intense anxiety . . . which makes you believe the fearful thought even more? Maybe you start repeating this thought to yourself, or elaborating […]
How Your Own Questions can Teach You the Art & Skill of Therapeutic Inquiry
More than anyone else, my Buddhist teachers taught me how to relate to questions and questioning. They taught me the art of inquiry which led to what I now call Therapeutic Inquiry. This kind of inquiry is the most important skill I teach to my clients, as well as to students in the Finding True […]
My Top 5 Tips for Dealing with Anxiety
Anxiety — What is it good for? Absolutely Nothin! I am writing to myself as much as to you today. Because over the years I’ve noticed there’s a sneaky quality to my anxiety. Whenever I notice it sneaking up, I’ve developed certain ways of talking to myself, to rouse the courage to challenge this self-defeating attitude. Here are my […]
Don’t Try So Hard! Not Your Average Way of Keeping Your New Year’s Resolutions
Happy New Year! Amazing to think that a brand new year has already begun. Already our hopes (and fears) are revving up! Is your inbox flooded with messages about keeping your New Year’s Resolutions? I promise this will not be just another ‘how to’ message for you. (If you like, you can skip straight to […]